Life is good

Man is life good.

I am sitting here with a cup of decaf capuccino, skim milk, and prune sauce on the top,  and a large bowl of all bran.

Sitting by the fire watching the squirrels and the chipmunks get fatter.....and fatter.(hope they do not try to go INTO any of those houses)

Had the most incredible day yesterday.  Everything is going better, the pains, the heartburn and yes even the big C.

I have to say I feel happier now than I have been in many months. I was trying to figure this out yesterday and wondering if it perhaps could be due to a drug, but then the only one I took yesterday was Sennakot .......???

Someone asked me yesterday morning how I felt about all of this, scared...... angry at having to go through all of this...?

I thought about it and perhaps over the past 6 weeks some of those thoughts have crossed my mind. In fact a few days I thought to myself..... "and here I FINALLY got a MAC and and IPHONE and now I have cancer!"

However yesterday, the only feeling I could muster up was.... lucky.  I feel very lucky.

I feel fortunate my sister had the excessive bleeding and that her D and C showed atypical cells, which likely prompted me to once again seek help.

I feel fortunate that Dr Gruchacz said "I think we should do a biopsy here and now" ( I was shocked, but it did not give me anytime to think about it.....)

I feel fortunate to have been referred to Dr Dotters.

I feel fortunate that she opted to do a complete pelvic lymph node dissection, because my lymph nodes looked otherwise normal (this is the only way they found the two positive nodes)

I feel fortunate that the PET scan was normal (showing no signs of significant tumours anywhere else)

and yes I feel extremely fortunate to be able to go through chemo and radiation, because I feel it is the only way to put an end to this cancer.

Though I am aware that there is still a chance this will come back somewhere else, I will feel that I have done everything possible to make certain those chances are extremely small.

I spoke with the doctor from the north bend clinic yesterday and the first thing he brought up was how we were going to follow this, he said that the ca 125 ( a blood test cancer marker used to follow success of treatment for pelvic cancers, usually ovarian)

would not be of much use with me, as mine had been low, so we will likely followup (watching for recurrences after chemo and radiation are over) with pelvic exams  and ct scans.

I was also thinking yesterday about how fortunate I am to live in a part of the world where a woman can EXPECT to live to 52 years of age and where a seemingly minor symptom like vaginal bleeding might make its way to a doctors office, let alone surgery, chemo and then radiation.

I am extremely fortunate to have Ken who makes my life so worth fighting for every minute of.

(he never reads my blogs.....)

and I also am fortunate to have a supportive family and a group of friends who have shown me the very very best this country USA has going for it.

Love and peace

Janet Bates

jankenb@gmail.com